You Sent Flyers to Everyone You Know and Nobody Sent You a Client

If your flyers brought no clients, the next step is a conversation rather than another mailing. Doula referrals come from relationships, and a flyer is only the excuse to start one. Go back to the five contacts most likely to see pregnant people, ask what their clients struggle with, and give them something useful to hand over.

Key Takeaways

• Doula referrals come from relationships, and a flyer is only the excuse to start one.
• A flyer asks the person holding it to keep it, remember it months later, and feel sure enough about a doula to pass the name along, which is hard to do for someone they have never seen work.
• After flyers go out, the next step for a doula is to talk with the five contacts most likely to see pregnant people and ask what their clients struggle with.
• People refer to someone who has made their own job easier, so a short class, a resource list, or a standing offer of a short phone consult gives a contact a reason to mention a doula.
• A doula who writes down every inquiry and where it came from will know in about three months which referral relationships are working.

A new doula asked me this recently: "What if you have sent your flyers to all of your contacts and no one has referred a client to you?"

Finding clients is one of the questions I hear most, and this one gets at something specific. The flyers went out, a few people said they looked nice, and then nothing happened. From there it is a short walk to deciding that nobody near you wants a doula, or that you made the flyer wrong.

Neither is likely. Sending the flyers was a reasonable first step. It was only the first one.

Why did my flyers not bring any doula referrals?

Doula referrals come from relationships, and a flyer is only the excuse to start one. If your flyers have gone out and nothing has come back, the next step is a conversation rather than another mailing.

Look at what a flyer asks of the person holding it. They have to keep it, remember it weeks or months later when someone mentions being pregnant, and feel sure enough about you to pass your name along. Most of the people on your list have never seen you work. They like you, and they have no idea what to say about you.

Paper also gets lost. I have written before about cards and flyers left in provider offices, where they often end up in a pile. A personal referral is worth far more, and it comes from someone who knows you well enough to say something specific.

Those flyers did do one thing for you. Everyone on your list now has a reason to hear from you again, and following up on something you sent is easier than starting cold.

Then there is timing. I recently asked a group of doulas where their last client came from. Their answers were past clients, other doulas, an OB, a midwife, a health department, Google, Facebook, Instagram, church, community events, family and friends, repeat clients, ChatGPT, and a bike store.

The bike store answer came from a doula who bought a bike, got to talking with the shop's owner, and left a business card with a note on the back. The call came a few years later.

Referrals keep their own schedule. One can come the week after you talk to someone, and another can take months. An education manager at one of my local hospitals took a while to warm up to me, and I tell that story in my post on networking with hospital staff. If your flyers went out last month, it is too early to call them a failure.

What makes someone remember that I am a doula?

I always leave blank space on my business card so I can write a note on it. I use it for anyone, for anything. Someone asks for a book recommendation. Someone needs the name of a plumber. I write it on my card and hand it over.

I want any excuse for someone to remember that I'm a doula. They may never hire me. I want them to think of me whenever someone near them talks about pregnancy, babies, or doulas.

"Hey, I know a doula!"

That thought is where a referral starts. The person keeps my card because of what I wrote on it, and the card says doula.

Your flyer told people what you do, and it gave them no reason to keep it. Whatever you do next with the people on your list should be useful to them first, even if they never send you anyone.

Getting more people to think "Hey, I know a doula!" about you is what I teach in Doula Referrals on Repeat. It is five days on where your referrals already come from and what to say to each kind of person who could send you clients. It runs October 26 to 30, with three live sessions at noon Eastern and two recorded ones, and it is $37.

Who should I go back to after my flyers bring no referrals?

Go back to the five contacts on your list who are most likely to see pregnant people. Five is few enough that you can have a real conversation with each of them.

Who to pick

Look for people who talk with pregnant people and new families as part of their week. A childbirth educator, a prenatal yoga teacher, a lactation consultant, or a therapist who works with pregnant and postpartum clients are all good places to start.

If your list is mostly friends, family, and coworkers, pick the five who know the most people having babies right now. A new doula's first clients come from the people already around them anyway.

Past clients belong here too. If you have them, start with them, and read my post on how to ask for doula reviews before you do.

Try not to assume who will and will not send people your way. What works for one doula can do nothing for another, because their clients and yours may come from different networks.

What to ask

Before you reach out to anyone, ask yourself one question: what do I actually want from this conversation? A specific ask sounds professional and gets remembered. A vague one gets a vague answer.

Once you are talking, ask about their work before you talk about yours. Ask what their clients struggle with. You will find out what would be useful to them, and they will find out that you listen before you pitch.

I don't have one standard way to ask for a referral. What you say depends on who you are talking to, and a past client, a neighbor, and a midwife each need a different sentence.

What can I give a referral contact besides a flyer?

People refer to someone who has made their own job easier. Give your contact something they can use with the families in front of them.

• A short class. Offer thirty minutes on a topic their clients keep asking about. I wrote up how to set up a short class at a library or community center.
• A resource list. A page of local resources is something your contact can hand a family that same day. I have a post on how to build a resource list your clients will use.
• A standing offer of a short phone consult. Tell your contact that anyone they send can have a short call with you. It gives them one easy sentence to say to a family.

Each of these gives your contact a reason to bring you up that has nothing to do with doing you a favor.

How do I know which referral relationships are working?

Track every inquiry and where it came from. When someone new contacts you, ask how they found you and write it down that day. It is easy to be so relieved that someone called that you forget to ask.

For each contact you are getting to know, keep three things:

• How many inquiries came from them
• Whether those people hired you
• Whether they were a good fit for your practice

The number of names matters less than how many turn into the kind of clients you want to work with.

Give it three months. By then you will know which relationships are working instead of guessing, and you can put more time into those and less into the rest. I listed the other numbers worth watching in what every doula should track monthly. If you are not sure referrals are where the problem is, start with these questions to ask when you need more doula clients.

If you would rather do this work with me than alone, Doula Referrals on Repeat is five days of working on your own referrals, October 26 to 30. Days 1, 3, and 5 are live on Zoom at noon Eastern, Days 2 and 4 are recorded, and replays stay available for three weeks after Day 5. You start by tracing where your clients have come from, or by listing who already knows you are a doula if you are new, and you leave with a referral plan for your own practice. It is $37, and registration closes October 25 at 11:30 PM Eastern.

Frequently Asked Questions

Should I leave flyers or cards at a doctor's or midwife's office?
You can, but cards and flyers left in an office often end up in a pile. A personal referral from a provider is worth far more. Instead of asking a provider to tell every patient about you, ask, "If someone asks about doulas, would you feel comfortable giving them my card?"

How many referral relationships does a doula need?
Start small. One person inside a hospital who knows your work matters more than knowing everyone in the building. Begin with five contacts, write down what each one sends you, and add more once you can see which ones bring clients who fit.

Is it okay to pay someone who sends me a client?
Thanking the people who send you clients is good practice. Paying for referrals is a different question, with a legal and ethical line that differs from state to state. I am a doula and educator, not an attorney, so ask a lawyer licensed in your state before you offer anyone money for a referral.

Can Google or ChatGPT send a doula clients too?
Yes. When I asked a group of doulas where their last client came from, Google and ChatGPT were both on the list, next to past clients and midwives. Being found online and being referred by people work together, and my post on Google Business Profile setup covers the online side.

Do home birth midwives refer clients to doulas?
Do not rule them out. Some doulas think home birth midwives do not need them, but in many places first-time parents planning a home birth are required to hire a doula. You may find referrals in places you did not expect.